We’ve all heard of Tantric Sex from at one time or another. We imagine wax dripping down toned and hairless bodies or hippies living communally all going at it. Not many people do actually understand what Tantric Sex is and how it can benefit your sexual health while strengthening your relationships. If you and your partner are going to start a new hobby together, think about cancelling your cooking class and starting a Tantric Sex Practice.
Tantric Sex is a New Age practice that stems out of traditional Hindu Tantra. Essentially, tantric sex is prolonged lovemaking to achieve and transcend the human orgasm. It is about building very slowly towards orgasm so that it may be extended and eventually surpassed. It focuses on touch, gaze, breath, and all aspects of sex equally, not only penetration. Tantra is not orgasm-centric, it attempts to make the entire experience an erotic experience of arousal that is much more than a means to an end.
Sex in all forms has a rejuvenating effect on its participants. Stress, depression, and general moodiness can disappear as sex can alter your brain chemistry giving you boosts of serotonin and testosterone. Sex is also a cardio activity that can improve circulation and tone the body.
Powerful orgasms that last up to twenty minutes can stimulate the pituitary and pineal glands, which are key players in regulating hormones and strengthening your immune system. Orgasms raise the level of oxytocin, which is a hormone that is related to our emotional IQ. Tantra practices can help us have a higher body-mind connection that can carry over into other areas of our life at the work place or at home, giving that extra confidence in our daily lives.
A Tantric Sex session may include a pre-sex shower that involves no touching to build tension, followed by a full hour of nude massaging to build up to penetration. A great exercise to start with is the idea of separating ‘receiving’ from ‘giving’. Totally surrender to your partner and fully receive sexual favors from them without reciprocation and vice versa. This will allow your experience to build more fully towards more intense climaxes.
It is easy to be skeptical of something that just sounds like a lot of textbook romantic foreplay, but the slow build is worth the benefits. This 5,000 year-old tradition improves sexual health, mental health, and can bring that extra spice back into the bedroom. These elongated love making sessions can weed petty arguments out of relationships pretty quickly. It can work to detoxify both the body and toxic relationships.
So here’s how to get started…..
Create some ambience
Get some comfortable pillows and light some candles to set the mood. Maybe you would like to start the session with a glass of wine to lighten the mood and encourage playfulness. Have some massage oils and lubricant ready next to the bed and any props you may want to incorporate later. You want to be well prepared so you will not have to interrupt the mood later, so now is the time to get anything you could anticipate needing during the session.
It is nice to bathe each other to start to build a connection and begin with some none sexual, but erotic touching. Before entering the prepared space being clean can add an element of relaxation and heighten the sense of sanctity. Maybe mix it up and take a lavender scented bubble bath, everyone involved usually appreciates a fresh scented lover.
Start to build tension
For beginners it is can be nice to start with the Yab-Yum position in which both partners undress and the male sits cross-legged while the female sits down on top of him and they are facing each other. Creating eye contact in this position is a recipe for serious sexual tension. Beginning to breath together, slowing down the breath to relax and placing hands on one another’s hearts or moving fingertips very lightly over one another’s bodies. Now is the time to tease and just barely touch to awaken the nerves and let the imagination run wild.
Take turns giving each other massages. These massages should always start in non-erogenous zones and then move towards the genitals towards the end. Make sure not to bring your partner to orgasm during this massage, so be careful to not over stimulate. There should also be a non-aggressive teasing aspect to this kind of touching.
Surprisingly, intercourse does not need to be the goal of tantric sex. You and your partner can choose to lay next to one another blissed out after your massages, but many people do choose to continue to further this connection. Maintain the slowness and eye contact you have with your partner when transitioning into intercourse. Do not simply through all your inhibitions aside, continue to stroll and not jog. In any position you choose it is important to work slowly and build steadily to preserve the connection and achieve the greatest result.