While you may not have been first in line to see 50 Shades of Grey with your partner or ready to join your local kink club, there are still ways you and your lover can enhance your playtime together using toys that aren’t whips, chains or fire pokers.
Both men and women admit they would like to use sex toys in the bedroom, but do not know how to go about introducing them. Many women don’t want to bring their vibrators into the room for fear of making their men feel self-conscious or inadequate.
Take the lead and let her know you are confident enough to use vibrators and dildos with her. Let her purchase the sex toy. Send her a link and tell her the bill is on you. This way she will be super comfortable using it since she chose it. You could alternatively browse together and keep the dialogue open about what kind of toys you would like to play with. Either way, open communication about which toy and how you want to play is key. Be sure to keep the toys clean by washing them after use with boiling water and natural soaps.
Here are some different toys and the best ways to play with them together:
Nipple and Clit Clamps
There are adjustable clamps on the market that make it easy to control the pressure for your partner. There are solo nipple clamps and whole sets that connect from the nipples to the clitoris. These can make your woman feel extra sexy while receiving extra stimulation. They are great for foreplay and a good naughty gift for her.
There is nothing sexier than a man secure enough to buy his woman a good vibrator. It can be enjoyable to use on your partner or to just sit back and watch her go ‘solo’ as part of the foreplay. Vibrators aren’t meant to just hide in a sock drawer, they can also help bring your partner to climax if you’ve finished first.
Want to start anal play but have a nervous partner? A butt plug is the perfect toy to help you both explore anal action. You can both wear them during intercourse and use them to work your way up to anal sex and/or pegging. Not everyone can just jump into anal sex and make it look like a porno, a butt plug is a great way to get use to the sensation and relax the anus muscles to allow for big and rougher play in the future.
Dildo and Strap On
If you are ready to foray into full on pegging a dildo and a strap on could be a fun toy to introduce into the love nest. A dildo on its own could also have similar use to the vibrator to help bring her to finish if you have already or just as a foreplay tool.